If you’re anything like me, the start of university was both the most exciting and nerve-wracking experience. While I think this is normal for most people, I don’t think many acknowledge it . We get too caught up in all the things university offers and don’t even acknowledge our feelings. Once we realize our feelings, it seems like everyone else has found their place and knows what they’re doing. Honestly, everyone else is faking it in some way. It becomes a cycle of pretending, which is why it’s so important to talk about.
I remember sitting in my Monday morning lecture in first year feeling so lost and overwhelmed. This class made me feel like I wasn’t good enough to be in university, so every class was a struggle. I created a group chat with my parents and asked them if they would be disappointed if I put my head down and studied while I was at university. I didn’t want to join a club, or join the honours program, I just wanted to get through my classes. Luckily, my parents are both amazing. They told me that no matter what I do, they would be proud, and that I don’t have to do it all if I don’t want to. They also encouraged me to make time for my friends, ensuring that school wasn’t the only thing I did. This advice was the best thing I could have heard at that time. With that, I have come up with a few more things I’d like to tell first-year Hailey.
1. Studying isn’t helpful if it’s the only thing you do
When you first start university the workload can be a big jump from high school. The workload distribution is very different and you have to spend a lot of time outside of class. This can be overwhelming and at first it can be hard to determine the most effective use of your time. I remember I would be in bed reading a textbook at 9:30 pm, and I am not a night owl. In addition, I was doing school work all day with very short breaks in between. I quickly understood this wasn’t providing me any balance and my mental health was taking a hit because I never took any time for myself. I began to implement boundaries with myself to ensure I didn’t reach the point of burnout. For example, I put my school work away at 8:30pm to give myself time to watch tv or read before bed.
2. Get involved
I know everyone says this, and I know you’re probably rolling your eyes at me. When I first started university it felt like I was struggling to simply stay on top of my school work and now all these people were telling me to join a club or volunteer. University is an adjustment, so while I encourage you to participate, you can do it on your own time. I recommend finding something that genuinely interests you instead of finding a resume builder. Use this opportunity to take your mind off school and meet new people. As I’m sure you can guess, I love writing, so I joined my university’s student-run newspaper to have that creative outlet. Volunteering with them has allowed me to write in a less formal way, which means I can be creative in a way that I don’t often get the opportunity to.
3. Make time for your friends and family
Whether you move away for university or stay living at home it is so important to stay connected with your friends and family and make new connections at university. It is easy for relationships to fall by the wayside because time constantly feels like its running out. You have to remember that these connections are your support system and they deserve your energy. It isn’t always easy to make the time, and sometimes you have to play catch-up, but I always feel better after hanging out with a friend or calling my mom.
4. Remember the world is so much bigger than university
It’s so easy to get caught up in your routine and forget that there is so much more to life than university. I don’t know how many times I have been so caught up in my thoughts and feeling like there is too much going on for me to handle. Then, I call my mom or walk outside without headphones on and feel like a weight has been lifted. Yes, university is important, and it deserves your time and energy, but when it becomes all-consuming, it becomes unhealthy. One of my biggest recommendations is to figure out how to get out of your head. It’s easy to scroll on reels, watch tv, or even read a book and say that gets you out of your head, but the problem is, as soon as you’re done, all those anxious thoughts come rushing back. As scary as it sounds, sometimes the best thing you can do is sit with your thoughts for a bit. In sitting with your thoughts, you gain comfort, which can take away their power. Sometimes rationalizing doesn’t work, but it’s good to talk yourself down. As well, I find going on walks, exercising, or getting outside reminds me “to find joy in the little things.
Had I known these things before starting university I may have found a balance that works for me sooner. While I think it’s important to learn from our mistakes, I also think it is fair to seek out advice before diving in. I hope you feel seen or find something that helps make university feel a little less overwhelming.
Thanks for reading everyone, see you Sunday! Until then, check out my Instagram for some behind-the-scenes and my Introduction post to learn more about me. I’d love to get to know you all better so feel free to comment on my blog post or dm me introducing yourself!
Hailey
Everything you’ve said here is so real and so true, Hailey, especially the world being bigger than university. It’s really important to not let yourself drown in it. That’s not all there is to life. Loved reading this!